Getting Fat, Leksi and Wallace Stevens

As I’m writing this journal entry, April is taking pictures of the almost-nude Aimae in front of me. I just finished reading my Word4UToday daily spiritual post, sort of, and probably you’d agree with me that this is definitely a juxtaposition of some sort. Sigh. This is just one of those poetic days.

I’m still recovering from the fact that there seems to be a lot of things to be done – and at Christmas break too! I’m alarmed at the amount of work that I still have to do in the next few weeks – and not even organizing them as early as today! – I’m such an idiot really.

I just read a short story by David Benioff entitled “The Devil Comes to Orekhovo” and I like it so much that I couldn’t sleep tonight. Okay, that maybe is an overstatement (as coffee played a role too!) but I really love the story so much I want to almost eat the paper. Very easy to read, but quite hard to dissect into parts – that makes it organically unified.

Also, I’ve been thinking a lot about myself. It feels as if nothing really major happened to me. Well, physically, I’m quite disturbed by the obvious observation that I’m getting thinner (my crush keeps on insisting that I’m fat! fat! fat! – which is actually eerie – I can still hear his voice at this time of night). Nah, I don’t believe him. So what do I have to eat to get some fat here – you know, that healthy fat?

I think I have to self-impose exercise every morning, but I tried it last week and it didn’t work since I usually stayed late at night (like tonight). So how do I prompt myself to eat more food? I mean, I don’t want to be really fat, in a sense, but can somebody puh-lease! give me a normal figure rather than this stick figure. The fact is, people tend to pity me in my physical state, saying that I’m malnourished or something even more terrible. Oh, I’m perfectly okay. Just no to fastfood.

It’s already 12:39 am, and I still can’t sleep. The character Leksi (from the Benioff story) keeps popping in and out from my mind. I’m wondering what would he do after the ending of the story. Gah! It really freaks me out!

April’s studying up in her bed. Aimae’s moaning in her dreams again, and although I couldn’t see Karla at all in her bed, I definitely know she’s there.

Right, perhaps I should try doing something productive – so that means taking this once-in-a-week opportunity (the opportunity to sleep late) into a serious leisure time. I’m not yet sleepy. Then, I’d read Wallace Stevens for a while.

PS. I love Wallace Stevens’ poem, The Emperor of the Ice Cream.


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