Random Excerpts from my 2011 Journal

Some kind of a year-end report, so to speak.

  • Unfortunately, writing has made a fugitive out of itself, and is far long gone for almost a year now. (Feb 12, 2011)
  • I’m starting to think that Digos was made for leaving.  Everyone just passed me by. (Feb 24, 2011)
  • Sometimes I have this urge to pull off a Jay Gatsby and just go away to find myself. (Mar 01, 2011)
  • In two year’s time I should be changing careers.  I don’t want to stay like this in the long run. It’s true, I want to go back to school, but I don’t know how far my academic caprice could ever take me. But I’m still not letting go. (Mar 12, 2011).
  • For me, the phrase end of the world is not at all “collective” in a sense. But we die alone.  The world still lives on. It is our concept of “the world” that dies with us. (Mar 19, 2011)
  • I hate the excitement of knowing that an unshaped poem is waiting to be done at this instant, only to be pacified by the thought that I still have to work.  Why does poetry catch you off-guard – in between piles of work, while at the party, while you’re determined to finish a serious task? (Mar 22, 2011)
  • Other people are careless enough not to leave the privacy of faith that is for other people. (April 23, 2011)
  • At some point I felt tinges of pain under my right breast. It’s crazy. I’ve been doing self-breast examination but it’s utterly pointless as I don’t really know how it works. I’m so paranoid. (May 10, 2011)
  • I have broken the sanctity of my entire trip, which was originally planned to be a “Thoreauvian escape” by constantly checking my online accounts.  (May 23, 2011)
  • Waking up an hour early, there is a freshness in this that I could not put into words, articulately.  I spent this early morning lounging around my mini library, tracing my fingers in several spines of my books as if each touch voices hellos and goodmornings.  (July 14, 2011)
  • It’s good to be back in school, to be honest. (Aug 24, 2011)
  • Monday morning, curling up in rattan chair with my left leg propped up on the side and a cup of coffee in my right hand. I closed my eyes as Bob Dylan’s voice filled my ears.  It’s all over now, baby blue. (Nov 14, 2011)
  • My advance English grammar class will kick me out of grad school! (Dec 08, 2011)
  • Rarely do I feel so sure about my feelings, but this isn’t one of those times.  (Dec 28, 2011)
  • I tucked him into the palm of my hands — a sharp, hurtful thing I just can’t let go. (Dec 31, 2011)

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