In a bad light

What happened in the Maguindanao Massacre is a gruesome murder of civilians, women and journalists, a result of the state of lawlessness in Maguindanao and the danger of private armies of powerful clans and families in the place. The massacre indeed earned feelings of sympathy for the victims and incurred hatred from all over journalists and media people not only in the country, but also throughout the whole world. With this incident, the country is put in a bad light, and labeled as one of the most dangerous countries for journalists.

While the forum held in AVR is meant to share with us the different angles of the issue, I still feel repulsive of the whole idea of massacre and I wanted so much for the perpetrators to pay for the crimes that they did. I think that what happened there in Maguindanao is purely cultural – sending women and journalists to file the COCs in the hope that these people (the murderers) wouldn’t hurt them. But apparently this idea drastically miscalculated the violent capabilities of the murderers to kill them. I couldn’t believe it myself that these murderers could be capable of doing gruesome things like shooting skulls, bodies crushed and buried, and women raped. Wasn’t there any hint of goodness and hesitation in the murderers’ part? From the state of the victims uncovered in the crime scenes, I don’t think so.

We are still groping for a shed of light and justice for what happened in the Maguindanao massacre. I hope that the government will disband these private armies before they became another group of people to hold long-running insurgencies against the government – so as not to repeat such hideous murder. Although I can’t help myself to feel cynical about the government’s plans to sort this out, I want to believe that there’s still hope in preventing further brutal killings such as this.

Frying Hotdogs on a Cold Tuesday Night and Thoughts Triggered From It

We’ve come to like hotdogs, the people in the boarding house. It’s because we’ve gotten used to weeks after weeks of canned goods and noodles. And now, everyone is anticipating the hotdogs. I’m currently cooking them. The hotdogs. Oh no, not the expensive ones, just the cheap, commercialized and mass produced hotdogs. We don’t have a choice. A lot of people around the planet must be hungry, so there’s no need to gripe at this moment. Thank God for the hotdogs.

It’s raining all of a sudden. It reminds me how cozy my bed is back at home. Lots of pillows and blankets.

I think I have a cold. I just got it. Right now. It’s kind of irritating, because I Continue reading

Coffee Break: The Second Time Around

It is normal routine in the boarding house that after drinking coffee (a hard one – concentrated), you may also try drinking coffee again the second time around. Boil water. Yep, and fill the kettle to its brim, and then it would be gone overnight. The hot water. Everybody would drink coffee in the boarding house. And lots of things to chat about. The coffee helps. Oh by the way, I love milk, among other things (and brandy is out of context), but the fact is, I always drink coffee in the boarding house because it’s cheap, it’s easy, and well, it’s coffee. You can spend 5 bucks for it for a single gulp, and in our case, it’s not even enough to make us stay alive overnight.

If you ask me, I don’t drink much Continue reading

Getting Fat, Leksi and Wallace Stevens

As I’m writing this journal entry, April is taking pictures of the almost-nude Aimae in front of me. I just finished reading my Word4UToday daily spiritual post, sort of, and probably you’d agree with me that this is definitely a juxtaposition of some sort. Sigh. This is just one of those poetic days.

I’m still recovering from the fact that there seems to be a lot of things to be done – and at Christmas break too! I’m alarmed at the amount of work that I still have to do in the next few weeks – and not even organizing them as early as today! – I’m such an idiot really.

I just read a short story by David Benioff entitled “The Devil Comes to Orekhovo” and I like it so much that I couldn’t sleep tonight. Okay, that maybe is an overstatement (as coffee played a role too!) but I really love the story so much I want to almost eat the paper. Very easy to read, but quite hard to dissect into parts – that makes it organically unified.

Also, I’ve been thinking a lot about myself. It feels as if nothing really major happened to me. Well, physically, I’m quite disturbed by the obvious observation that I’m getting Continue reading

Late Night Stomachaches and The Dead

I just finished doing my task: cook rice and viand.  For today, we had dried fish.  I don’t really enjoy cooking dried fish because the smell still reeks off in my hand even though I already applied alcohol.  I’m still not in my mood to eat yet – don’t get me wrong, I love dried fish – but i prefer to just lie down some more and listen to music.  I could hear (from my bedroom) the clanging of pots and plates from the kitchen, and the sounds of someone stirring coffee,

Last night was terrible.  By 12:32 am, I got a stomachache.  I mean, what the heck was that all about?  I was so sleepy at that time but i was forced to wake up to knock in the next room just to ask some efficascent oil.  I was all worried lying in my bed.  The ache seemed to crush my stomach.  Was it eating all my gut out? Is this what they call ulcer? Oh God, forbid!

Maybe it’s just a case of not using the blanket.


The boarding house is so clean I feel like studying.  I’m facing my “The Dead” readings by James Joyce.  I still haven’t read it, and I’m reluctant to do so.  But it’s no good telling this because in a moment or two I’m going to read it anyway.  So I just enjoyed myself browsing through Twilight book, or computing photocopy expenses, but later on I’d feel conscience-stricken about the fact that I have to read the “The Dead”.  Fine. I have to read it because it’s supposed to be tackled tomorrow in our Fiction class, and this would be my first time to read a James Joyce work.  Maybe, in due time, I’d read the Ulysses, but I don’t think the time is near enough for that.  🙂

I just can’t bear the thought of my photocopy expenses.  I’ve been wavering my allowance off for photocopies sometimes I feel like eating them when reading them.  Well, that would be a literal way of digesting them, you think?

So i guess, i have to read “The Dead” now.  Bye for now!

Flies, Fish Stuff, and Face Warps

As i was writing this entry, I’m in the bhaus, sitting across with Gecel who’s playing Bloxx again in my phone.  April’s complaining about the flies hovering around somewhere, I couldn’t blame her, you see, since we got a new plastic trash can as big as a water drum, people in the boarding house just carelessly throw things without verifying whether it’s going to rot or not.  Like throwing mango skins, fish-stuff-leftover, wet vegetables, rotten, I mean, it’s no surprise about the flies over there!  Since I’m in the cleaners list today, need I say i have to really fix this problem?

It’s already 8pm, we just finished eating our supper – that’s corned beef, which i actually cooked a moment ago.  Then since I’m one of the cleaners tonight (yeas, cleaning time is night time) I cleaned the whole kitchen area and the living room and it makes me feel so good to see the whole area clean.

We had fun messing around the Face Warp App, making funny faces, and the pictures are really hilarious!